


Demons and Gods

by Cadapech



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series), Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: Bad Puns, Platonic Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-17 23:17:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21601366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cadapech/pseuds/Cadapech
Summary: Black Hat gets invited on a coffee date against his will; it's either deal with Alastor alone or let the masses help.
Kudos: 53





	Demons and Gods

**Author's Note:**

> So I think I'm going to make a story with Alastor and Black Hat as I love them both too much. I hope I can do them both proud.l

"So what do you say, do we have a deal?" Eyelids lowered Alastor held out his hand to the eldritch horror - whom was busy glaring him down.

Black Hat had only known the Radio Demon for a short while, and while he'd been shown nothing but a good time this 'adventure' - if he could even call it that - seemed, well, stupid. The demon was proposing they visit into Hatville and just - get coffee; no tricks, no schemes, just a fresh cup of Joe. For as little time he was acquainted with Alastor to be suddenly asked to 'sip and chill' had him on guard; why should he go into the city when there was a perfectly good office right at home.

"No." It was as firm as he could make it, and usually it'd be left at that, but things were different with Alastor - no became 'gotcha' and then wherever it went from there.

"Oh come now, don't you wanna enjoy some nice black coffee? Like jazz in the morning - smooth and piercing!"

"No." Black Hat's grip tightened on his cane as the Radio Demon gripped his shoulder and leaned in close - abnormally close. Black Hat could feel the 'Nope' within the situation.

"You're just confused, you've never tasted morning coffee on a dreary day! Ho-ho, if only you knew the joys of a depressing grey tea. Say, what did the kettle order at the restaurant?"

Black Hat used a tendril to peel the other's hand from his body before taking his time brushing off the spot. "What."

"A **_tea_** bone steak." This prompted a fit of laughter from Alastor and Black Hat decided, then and there, that he'd rather face this monstrosity in public where other people could drown out the noise than cooped up in the manor.

The trip to the coffee shop was uneventful - more bad puns and what else, but eventually they found themselves seated in a window booth, two cups of java in front of them. One black, the other with one cream one sugar.

Black Hat reached for his drink and was finally settling into the silence between them when-

"Look, Blacky, a street performance!" Alastor had his gaze fixated on the window and when Black Hat turned to peer at whatever it was that caught the other's attention his jaw dropped.

There was Demencia, fighting with some doe eyed woman; and she seemed to be evenly matched - which was a first.

"You go, Charlie, doll! Show her the old what for!"

Black Hat's claws dug into the table, as he stood up, a growl errupted from deep within his chest.

"Demencia!" he howled, "If you lose you can forget about eating tonight!"

"Well that's a bit much." Alastor said.

"And what of it?"

"I never said it was _too_ much."

Black Hat squinted and was about to question what was even the point when glass spattered all over the table and Demencia came crashing afterwards.

A hiss and she was tackled again, the blonde girl pinning her to the ground. Claws held her down, and as she kicked her legs she found herself grinning, "I give! I give. You said we'd go shopping yes?!"

"Yes!" Charlie exclaimed, "And I guarantee your special guy will notice you more."

This was stupid, idiotic, beyond absurd-

"Oh Charlie, we're leaving. We've got a lot of work to do tomorrow; I promise you we'll come visit here more often but for now let's focus on our little hotel, sound swell?"

A portal opened up and Black Hat caught a glimpse of wherever it was the Radio Demon and Blondie were off to. 'It's Hell, Black Hat.' he told himself, but it seemed so cheery - run down as all, well, Hell; but still.

As the portal closed the eldritch being let his eyes sweep over to his subordinate, and as he straightened himself up he cleared his throat.

"Finally, we can leave this vile shop. Your punishment awaits you in my office, don't be late." Then using his cane he opened himself a portal and stepped through. In the short timespan it took to get to his office he thought. He thought about seeing that strange deer demon, and how jolly he seemed. He also thought about the subtle mischievousness beneath the smile and he found himself grinning. Ready to visit the man in his own turf.

If Black Hat had to suffer, then so did he.


End file.
